Sunday, January 22, 2012
Motherly Overdrive | A call to 911
In this journey of mothering...there are a few things I pray for EVERY day and night...that my child grows healthy and strong and for him to be safe. My ultimate nightmare would be that something would happen to him. Calling 911 is a number that I hope I never have to and today I had to do just that.
A minuscule fall from the couch led to a dreaded call when he went limp, head back, eyes rolled into his head and convulsing in my arms after I tried to comfort him. It only lasted 10-15 seconds, but if you count one-one- thousand, two-one-thousand, etc...those are some very long seconds.
I think motherly overdrive kicked in and I just knew that I had to get some help. It just didn't feel like a reaction that a little child should have from a slight fall...he didn't even land on his head. I felt my legs tingle and my heart go a million beats per minute, but somehow I remained standing and able to dial those three numbers still holding him barely moving in my arms...motherly overdrive.
And once those blazing sirens came 'round the bend and pulled up to my house fire truck and all..he was wiggled out of my arms grabbing his cars as if nothing had happened. It made me feel like "uh-okay, he was just convulsing...sorry I called you?"...but they were so kind. So understanding. Prodding his little body, checking his pupils, spine and heart rate. Eli looked like he felt a little overwhelmed and happy at their presence...like "hey, can we do this again?..you guys are cool!", as he showed off his trucks to them.
Daddy had raced home from work with little explanation to anyone what had happened. I have to say I love my husband for his love for our son and just racing home to make sure he was okay. His child was hurt and no amount of money or obligation was going to keep him away. It's so nice that in a moment like that I didn't feel alone.
I'm a blessed mom that for the time being he is okay. He will of course have a thorough check-up with his Dr. (who we ran into at Costco the other day...it was like when you see your teachers out..."you mean you guys have lives outside?!").
I'm just sort of reflecting too because when things like this happen life just seems so fragile and short. I get that slap that I need to wake me out of being complacent. Never take anything for granted people say...but everyone does, everyday. It's hard to be nostalgic every moment of every day and be in the moment, when there are chores, bills, a family to juggle, friends to keep in the loop...it goes on and on. I feel like I am a good mom but there is always room for improvement...and you better believe the second thing I pray is that "tomorrow make me even better than today, Lord." I think this is how he answers those prayers...okay, okay I get it!
Kiss a little longer, hug a little tighter, listen a little more...be caught up in the ones you love. I know that I felt that all when I tucked him in. To just start a day fresh tomorrow and let things that bothered me today go...because they don't matter. I have what matters, a loving family to create memories with---my little boy to kiss goodnight.